Thursday, January 7, 2010

Affair Recovery: 10 Things You Need to Know

Drill down on your emotions.

I’ve met many couples that come through counseling after an affair having a stronger marriage than they did before. The reason for this is that they took the time to really drill down on their emotions and look for the reasons and unmet needs that prompted them to turn away from their spouse and find someone else. If you’re recovering from an affair, it’s key that you take some time to think about the following key questions and find a gentle way to share this information with your spouse:

  • How were you feeling in the marriage before the affair?
  • What do you think your relationship was missing?
  • What did you get out of having an affair?
  • What made it difficult to turn towards your spouse and talk about what you were missing?
  • What do you really want and need from your partner in order to feel comfortable, safe, and loved?

No comments: